"FROM SELF-DESTRUCTION TO RECONSTRUCTION"
I recently read those words on a Facebook ad in my newsfeed.
They resonated with me so and strongly and deeply.
These words are my truth.
These words are my life.
I was on a road to self-destruction. I'd been on that path for quite sometime. When my Mum was hospitalised a year before her passing, I finally acknowledged that truth, and to be honest, it scared me. I stood at a cross roads. It felt like my last "wake up" call. I was running out of time to change, and for that change to make a difference. I was physically killing myself by smoking. I was mentally killing myself by remaining in a toxic marriage. I could no longer hide from the truth. I was on the road to self-destruction, and had been picking up speed for a number of years.
I chose change. Reconstruction.
It hasn't been easy. Not even a bit. The first steps were so painful, I wanted to die. Crazy right? I was in so much emotional pain; that "tearing apart" from the last 20+ years of my life. But, I knew it was necessary if I wanted to start "living" again. Thankfully, I received the medical and psychological help I needed to get through that initial transition.
Lately, a lot of days I fell like I'm walking uphill. Some days I feel as if I'm walking through mud, but the important thing is that I'm still walking (or riding my bike lol). I haven't had holidays from my work in over a year so I'm feeling a little burnt out. I'm counting down the weeks now, until I embark on my Brisbane to Sydney ride. I can't wait to hit the road!
"FROM SELF-DESTRUCTION TO RECONSTRUCTION"
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